Idol Gossip: Memphis

Unlike Seattle or Minnesota, the bad American Idol auditions in Memphis didn't even have the saving grace of being funny. They just out and out sucked. Conversely, the good ones were among the best we've yet seen in Season 6. This is reflected in the fact that more hopefuls made it through to Hollywood from Memphis than from either of the two previous cities.

The two best auditions came totally out of left field and surprised everyone. You could tell that the judges, especially Cowell, had written off Sundance Head even before he opened his mouth. So had I. After all, just 'cause Daddy had a big hit four decades ago is no guarantee that the talent gene didn't skip a generation. He looked like a stereotypical Idol wannabe/loser: A fat guy with a stupid looking beard and a weird name--like Topher McCain, for instance. Unlike Topher, Sundance can sing. I, like Simon, will be amazed if he ain't in the Top 12.

He said that because his dad Roy Head's "Treat Her Right" was knocked out of the #1 spot by the Beatles, old Roy doesn't much like the Fab Four. Well, I've heard rumors that there may be a Beatle themed show this season guest starring either Paul McCartney or George Martin. How is Sundance gonna react to that?

Anyway, I don't think Sundance has a chance at winning. Instead, he'll be this year's Chris Daughtry: The judges' favorite and every fan and Pop Culture commentator's pick to wins who will lose out in the later weeks to some far less talented lovable goofball.

Like, perhaps, Sean Michel.

According to Sean, people say he looks like Osama Bin Laden, Jesus, Fidel Castro, or a homeless bum. When I saw him, I thought he must be Troy Benham's long lost twin, but he surprised me and the judges by actually being able to sing.

Another good prospect for Top 12hood is professional background singer Melinda Doolittle. Honestly, I wasn't expecting much from her, either. What I really expected was a replay of last week's incident with the "vocal coach," involving Randy telling her she should quit the music biz as of yesterday.

What is up Randy's tuchus this season, anyway? Some of the harshest judgments and sharpest putdowns have not from Simon, as you would expect, but from the formerly genial giant, Randy. Whassamatta, Big Guy? Was there a Journey reunion and they forgot to invite you?

Well, that wraps up Memphis. Tonight, it's on to the city so nice that they named it twice. As the song says, if you can make it there, you'll make it anywhere. It's up to you, New York, New York.