Tales From The Fridge

I was reading an article in the latest issue of PLAYBOY (Yes, I said "reading an article." Some people do actually do that. Stop snickering.) where I came across the following odd but interesting statistic: "Researchers...have found that the average American opens the refrigerator door 22 times a day."
This provides me with further proof, though no more was truly needed, that I am not average. I have never in my life, definitely not in all the years I've been living on my own, opened my refrigerator door 22 times in one day. In fact, I can often go for days at a time without opening it at all.
I suppose that would change if I actually kept food in there rather than simply using it to hide the dirty dishes and stash empty pizza boxes.